“A bureaucrat is a Democrat who holds some office that a Republican wants.”

“It's not that the Democrats are playing checkers and the Republicans are playing chess. It's that the Republicans are playing chess and the Democrats are in the nurse's office because once again they glued their balls to their thighs.”

“If you want to live like a Republican, vote like a Democrat.”

“A Republican is a man who wants you to go t'church every Sunday. A Democrat says if a man wants to have a glass of beer, he can have it.”

“Republicans always play the same game. They are for big business and money interests...We know from long experience that the people are better served by Democratic public officials, and we are letting the people down when we permit factional fighting to put Republicans in office.”

“The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too.”