“If stakes and garlic were the top two things that could kill a vampire, ninth grade gym was a close third.”

“How do you kill a vampire? "Silver bullets?”“That’s werewolves.”“Cloves of garlic?”“That’s French bread.”

“I thought only a wooden stake through the heart killed a vampire. (Amanda) A wooden stake through the heart will kill just about anything. And if it doesn't, run like hell. (Kyrian)”

“If you thought eighth grade was tough, try it with fangs and a fear of garlic.”

“There is a crucifix, a few cloves of garlic, a wooden stake, a hammer, a blob of Silly Putty, and a pocketknife. “You do realize these people aren’t vampires, right?” I say when Sam walks back in. “Yeah, but you never know. They’re probably crazy, like you said.” “And even if we were hunting vampires, what the hell is the Silly Putty for?” He shrugs. “Just want to be prepared.”

“Ninth grade is a minor inconvenience to him. A zit-cream commercial before the Feature Film of Life.”