“I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to stop going to those places.”

Henny Youngman

Henny Youngman - “I told the doctor I broke my leg in...” 1

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“Mr. Passaro, let me teach you about how medicine works.” He starts out.“One of two things is going to happen. Either the Doctors are going to say I told you so, or they are going to say that Jess was the exception. What you believe will determine who gets to say I told you so to whom.” “Never stop believing.” He begs me.“Doctor, you are on the team”. I say.He smiles.”

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“Then his eyes glazed over for a second. 'I go places sometimes,' he told me, his voice as thready as his eyes. 'Don't know why I go places... I just do.”

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“My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people.”

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“If you asked me how I felt when they told me I would marry Wen Fu, I can say only this: It was like being told I had won a big prize. And it was also like being told my head was going to be chopped off. Something between those two feelings.”

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