“Darling Daddy,This is Rose.The shed needs new wires now it has blown up.Caddy is bringing home rock-bottom boyfriends to see if they will do for Mummy. Instead of you.Love, Rose.”

“Darling Daddy,This is Rose.Very good news. Caddy is going to marry Micheal. In case you have forgotten because you have not been home for so long he is the one with the ponytail and the earring that you do not like. And Caddy says she will have a white lace dress and three bridesmaids, Saffron and Sarah and me, and a big party for everyone, all her old boyfriends too. Fireworks. A band. A big tent called a marquee. But where will we put it? Carriages with white horses for us all to go to the church. Afterward Caddy and Micheal will go for a holiday to Australia to visit the Great Barrier Reef. Caddy has it all worked out and Mummy says Yes She Can Of Course You Can Darling Of Course You Must Do That. Saffron said That Will Cost a Few Weeks Housekeeping and Mummy said Yes But We Do Not Need to Worry About That. DADDY WILL PAY.Love, Rose.”

“Caddy came home on Friday evening. Perfectly Harmless Patrick brought her in his battered old car..."Crikey, Caddy!" said Indigo, and he disappeared upstairs to tell Rose.Eve murmured, "Sweet," rather doubtfully.Sarah said, not doubtfully at all, "Horrendous! The worst yet. Rock bottom.""He had a very difficult childhood," said Caddy...."Who didn't?" asked Saffron unsympathetically. "Gosh, he's ancient, Caddy! Look, he's going bald! All that long trailing stuff is just a disguise!""If I was going bald," said Sarah, "I would face the fact and have it all shaved off.""Well, I thought Mummy would like him," said Caddy defensively. "...Anyway, I can always take him back.""I think you're going to have to, Caddy darling," said Eve... "Hello, Rose darling! Come in and see what Caddy has brought home to show us!"She escaped, and Rose, who had already heard the news from Indigo, glanced at Patrick and began laughing."See?" said Sarah. "Rose knows! Absolutely rock bottom! You cannot be serious, Caddy!""Oh, stop looking at him!" said Caddy, uncomfortably. "I'll find something to cover him up with in a minute!""How long are you leaving him there for?" asked Rose."Just until Sunday," said Caddy, trying to sound casual."Till Sunday!" repeated Saffron. "So is Micheal dumped?""Of course he isn't!" said Caddy indignantly. "I've never dumped anyone!""Start!" said Saffron. "Otherwise they just pile up, taking up the sofas...”

“Darling Daddy,This is Rose.Saffy says everyone says it is Indigo's fault that their Head has two black eyes and a swelled-up nose.Love from Rose.P.S. Sarah who is here says to tell you love from wheelchair woman too.Rose's father telephoned especially to tell Rose not to call Sarah Wheelchair Woman."That's what she called herself," protested Rose. "She thought of it! Aren't you worried about what I told you about Indigo and the Head?""What?" asked Bill. "Oh that! Two black eyes and a swollen nose! I don't think I can believe that one, Rose darling!”

“Darling Daddy,This is Rose.So flames went all up the kitchen wall. Saffron called the fire brigade and the police came too to see if it was a trick and the police woman said to Saffron Here You Are Again because of when I got lost having my glasses checked. But I was with Tom whose grandmother is a witch on top of the highest place in town.Love, Rose.”

“Darling Daddy,Poor Saffy. She had a big fight in the boys toilets on Monday, did you know? A very big fight and Sarah helped and it was terrifying. Said a boy in my class who has a brother who was there.Saffy washed her hands and said Never Ever Never Dare You Touch My Brother. (Indigo). And the plug holes were blocked with hair.Love from Rose.-Sarah's mother has given us soup. Soup soup soup and then it was all gone.L.F.R.”

“It had not seemed to matter that Rose was only eight years old."More than eight," said Rose. "Nearly nine.""Darling Rose, even almost nearly nine-year-old's don't fall in love," said forgetful Caddy.Caddy tried very hard to comfort Rose when Tom had left. It was not an easy job. It was like trying to comfort a small, unhappy tiger."Who said anything about falling in love?" growled Rose crossly. "Falling! Falling is by accident! I didn't fall in anything!""Oh. Right. Sorry, Posy Rose.""And I am definitely not in love!”