“This is the part in the movie where that guy says, "Zombies? What zombies?" just before they eat his brains. I don't want to be that guy.”
“What this movie needs is more brain eating zombies. ”
“I don't like zombie movies, they're just plain silly.”
“The guy just stood there. Hello. There’re zombies everywhere. Try looking behind you, douche canoe.”
“Yo, zombie guys, pay attention. When it's Simon says, that means you have to do what I say. Let's be more direct. The Slayer says die, like, forever.”
“Some guys-a lot of guys-don't believe what they are seeing, especially if it gets in the way of what they want to eat or drink or believe. Me, I don't believe in God. But if i saw him, I would. I wouldn't just go around saying, "Jesus, that was a great special effect." The definition of an asshole is a guy who doesn't believe what he's seeing.”