“Batman's a scientist.”

“Well you know boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like women. You just have to read the manual and press the right button.”

“America's health care system is second only to Japan, Canada, Sweden, Great Britain, well ... all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky starts we don't live in Paraguay!”

“I'd be vegetarian if bacon grew on trees”

“But Marge, what if we chose the wrong religion? Each week we just make God madder and madder.”

“Sing, goddess, of Achilles' ruinous angerWhich brought ten thousand pains to the Achaeans,And cast the souls of many stalwart heroesTo Hades, and their bodies to the dogsAnd birds of prey.”

“Man is the vainest of allcreatures that have their being upon earth. As long as heavenvouchsafes him health and strength, he thinks that he shall come tono harm hereafter, and even when the blessed gods bring sorrow uponhim, he bears it as he needs must, and makes the best of it; forGod Almighty gives men their daily minds day by day. I know allabout it, for I was a rich man once, and did much wrong in thestubbornness of my pride, and in the confidence that my father andmy brothers would support me; therefore let a man fear God in allthings always, and take the good that heaven may see fit to sendhim without vainglory.”