“I wouldn't want his demonic, undead-blood-smeared, wolf-smelling ass riding me either.”

“Derek favored his left side. His horse refused to bear him. I couldn't blame the horse. I wouldn't want his demonic, undead-blood-smeared, wolf-smelling ass riding me, either. But it made us slow.”

“I think you’re confused as to the nature of our relationship. You and I, we don’t get along. You’re a psychopathic control freak. You order me around and I want to kill you. I’m a pigheaded insubordinate ass. I drive you mad and you want to strangle me.”

“The vampire stared at me, his mouth slack as Ghastek assessed his options. I took a couple of forms from my desk, put them into the vamp's mouth, and pulled them up by their edges."What are you doing?" Ghastek asked."My hole puncher broke.""You have no respect for the undead.”

“And how did your day go?" I asked Ascanio. He turned to me, a dreamy look on his pretty face. "We killed things. There was blood. Fountains of blood. And then we had barbecue.”

“Either you can work on both, or you can keep thinking with your balls. It's your choice. Say 'pop.'""Pop?""That was the sound of me pulling your head out of your ass. If you stick it back up there again, there is nothing I can do about it. This is the only lecture you'll ever get from me."I headed for the door.”

“Since when do you give a crap about my welfare anyway? I think you're confused as to the nature of our relationship. You and I, we don't get along. You're a psychopathic control freak. You order me around and I want to kill you. I'm a pigheaded insubordinate ass. I drive you mad and you want to strangle me.""Once! I did it once!""Once was plenty. The point is, we don't play nice. We-"He jerked his arms out from under my knees, pulled me to him, oblivious to the dagger, and kissed me.”