“Your ability to remain alive never ceases to amaze me.”

“Georgie, stop trying to resurrect the shoes. They were never alive in the first place.”

“This is embarrassing,” Mr. Haffey informed me. I winked at him. “What, Mrs. Haffey never carried you over the threshold on your wedding night?”

“The human body is an amazing organism. It can go from dead tired to completely alert in a terrified blink.”

“Your headlights don't scare me.”

“Say 'pop.'" "Pop?" "That was the sound of me pulling your head out of your ass.”

“Put your badass faces on and follow me.”