“A bad review is even less important than whether it is raining in Patagonia.”

“Do you think it will rain?Milo: But I thought you were the Weather Man?No, I'm the Whether man, for it is more important to know whether there will be weather, whether than what the weather will be.”

“There are few things more abrasive to the human spirit, even in Patagonia, than someone standing behind you chomping and sucking ice cubes.”

“I personally can't think of anything less sacrosanct than a bad book or even a mediocre book.”

“Luckily, a recent survey published in the American Sociological Review revealed that atheists are the least trusted group in America—less trusted, even, than homosexuals. It makes sense at least we trust the homosexuals with our hair.”

“You will find, that when you have someone to love, that the face is less important than the brain, and the body is less important than the heart.”