“The world would not be in such a snarl, had Marx been Groucho instead of Karl.”

“Karl Marx was right, socialism works, it is just that he had the wrong species”

“What does Karl Marx put on his pasta? Communist Manipesto!”

“I know I'm not funny. I mean, let's face it, I'm no Groucho Marx. But if you're a guy, and you're watching late night television, are you gonna start jacking off to Groucho? I don't think so!”

“Karl Marx: "Religion is the opiate of the masses."Carrie Fisher: "I did masses of opiates religiously.”

“The obvious differences apart, Karl Marx was no more a reliable prophet than was the Reverend Jim Jones. Karl Marx was a genius, an uncannily resourceful manipulator of world history who shoved everything he knew, thought, and devised into a Ouija board from whose movements he decocted universal laws. He had his following, during the late phases of the Industrial Revolution. But he was discredited by historical experience longer ago than the Wizard of Oz: and still, great grown people sit around, declare themselves to be Marxists, and make excuses for Gulag and Afghanistan.”