“It's really too bad that so much crumby stuff is a lot of fun sometimes.”

“I think if you don't really like a girl, you shouldn't horse around with her at all, and if you do like her, then you're supposed to like her face, and if you like her face, you ought to be careful about doing crumby stuff to it, like squirting water all over it. It's really too bad that so much crumby stuff is a lot of fun sometimes.”

“A lot of bad stuff in the world wasn’t really that bad until someone tried to change it.”

“This is important stuff, so it's crucial not to get too serious, to realize that this is all fun and games. The attitude 'business is serious, it's not fun and games' leads to financial failure, and I won't tolerate it in my company.”

“[On playing a bad guy in Harry Potter's film]: I think it's more fun, there are a lot of goodies in the film and not a lot of baddies, so I like to be in the baddie group.”

“This living stuff is a lot. Too much, and not enough. Half empty, and half full.”