“I was almost awestruck when I realized that like this meant without a condom. Jack's vulnerability shone through him in that exact moment like a lighthouse beacon in a raging storm. Somewhere along the way, we'd crossed an imaginary line where feelings and emotions blurred into the unknown. A place neither of us dared to go before.”
“Being on that pitcher’s mound, it’s the one thing I’m really good at. The one thing I haven’t fucked up. And when I’m on the field, everything else fades away. You know?” He turned to look at me, his eyes craving understanding. I smiled and he continued. “It’s like my mind is clear when I’m out there. It’s not about my mom or my dad or the stupid shit I’ve done. It’s about me, the ball, and the batter. It’s the one place in the world where I feel like I’m in control. Like I have a say in what happens around me.”I stopped my head from nodding in agreement once I realized that I was doing it. “I feel that way when I’m taking pictures. Anything that I’m not seeing through my lens fades away in the background. And I get to frame my picture any way I choose. I get to dictate how it looks. What’s in it. What isn’t. Behind that lens I have complete control in how things are seen.”He smiled, his dimples indenting his cheeks. “You get it.”
“I feel like someone ripped out my heart and smashed it with bricks. It hurts. I hurt. And I'd gladly take your hurt too if it meant that you'd be okay. I'd do anything for you.”
“Because once you give your body to a guy, there's no taking it back. And once you've done that it opens up feelings, emotions and vulnerabilities you never knew you were capable of having. I'm not ready to give him my heart. What if he breaks it?”
“But when I told you I loved you, I meant it. I didn't mean that I'd love you only if it was easy, or only if it was drama-free. I think we both know life isn't like that.”
“I was one hundred percent not in control of this situation. This girl fucking owned me right now. I sat on that bed waiting for her to give me the time of day. I didn't necessarily like this feeling, but I suffered through it... for her. I convinced myself that I'd probably suffer through pretty much anything for this girl.”
“Sometimes letting go is the only way to find out who you're meant to hold on to.”