“That's the first rule of command; be consistent! You can be sadistic, you can be lazy, you can be stupid, but if you're consistent the crew will still let you sit in when they play dominoes.”
“People are too lazy and too stupid to think for themselves that we've got sitcoms with canned laughter that let's you know when to laugh if you're to stupid to know when the joke is.”
“You can not argue with stupid but you can certainly play with it.”
“You can't see a forest when you're sitting in a tree. You can, however, describe the leaves. That's how you learn to see.”
“Master the rules of the game until you can play it better they can.”
“Since life consists of madness spiked with lies, the farther you are from each other the more lies you can put into it and the happier you'll be. That's only natural and normal. Truth is inedible.”