“I had a question. 'Why does the name Pearl Harbor sound so familiar?'The lieutenant colonel's eyes narrowed. 'Pearl Harbor is the most famous U.S. military base in the world,' he said crisply. 'It's the only place on U.S. soil that has been attacked in a wars, since the Revolutionary War.'None of this was ringing a bell, but you already know I'm totally uneducated. Gazzy leaned over to whisper, 'It was a movie with Ben Affleck.'Ah. Now I remembered.”

“Angel raised her hand. "Excuse me. What does LTC stand for?" She blinked innocently."Loving Tender Care?"Gazzy suggested.If our instructor had had lasers for eyes, he would have sliced Gazzy in half."Lieutenant colonel," he sputtered.”

“I miss you more than Michael Bay missed the markWhen he made Pearl Harbor. I miss you more than that movie missed the pointAnd that's an awful lot, girl. And now, now you've gone awayAnd all I'm trying to say, is: Pearl Harbor sucked and I miss you.I need you like Ben Affleck needs acting schoolHe was terrible in that film. I need you like Cuba Gooding needed a bigger partHe's way better than Ben Affleck. And now, all I can think about is your smileand that shitty movie, too. Pearl Harbor sucked and I miss you. Why does Michael Bay get to keep on making movies? I guess Pearl Harbor suckedjust a little bit more than I miss you.”

“It's for upset stomachs,' Dylan said, trying to hide a smile. He pointed to the words in the box. 'It's to reduce gas in your digestive system, not to create more gas to make explosions.'Gazzy's face fell as Iggy said. 'Really? Gazzy take it! Take the whole box!''I second that emotion!' said Total.”

“Gazzy called over to me "I can't see anything!""I can't see anything either," Iggy complained."I'm rolling my eyes, Ig." I had to tell him that because he couldn't see me do it, what with his blindness and all.”

“I found this, though," Gazzy said excitedly, holding up a small green box. "Gas-X! Like, 'X' for explosion! This is great! I'm thinking I rig this with a detonator and-""Did you find that in the medicine cabinet?" Dylan asked."Yeah.""It's for upset stomachs," Dylan said, trying to hide a smile. He pointed to the words on the box. "It's to reduce gas in you digestive system, not to create more gas to make explosions."Gazzy's face fell as Iggy said, "Really? Gazzy, take it! Take the whole box!”

“Yeah, and so Max and Dylan are supposed to, like, go to Germany and have kids together," I heard Gazzy say. My eyes popped open and I bolted upright."What?" Fang said, his voice icy."Gazzy!" I yelled.Wide blue eyes looked at me in surprise, then back at Fang's stoic face. "Oh. Was I not supposed to say anything?" Gazzy asked.”