“I offered to pee on him, but they said no”

“De tall, dark vun--dere's nothing special about him at all," ter Borcht said dismissively of Fang, who hadn't moved since the doctor had come in.Well, he's a snappy dresser," I offered. One side of Fang's mouth quirked.”

“Hi, Max," she said, pushing her shades up onto her curls."I hope your wearing sunscreen," i said, “your gonna have hella wrinkles by the time your ten.”“Want some daiquiri?” she offered, pointing at a blender.“Is it traitor flavored?” I asked.”

“Feeding a crowd?' the woman behind the counter asked.Yes, ma'am ,' Fang said sweetly.Yeah, him and all his split personalities, I thought.”

“When my son, Jack, was four, I had to make a trip to Los Angeles. I asked him if he was going to miss me. 'Not so much,' Jack told me. 'You're not going to miss me?' I said. Jack shook his head, and he said, 'Love means you can never be apart.”

“Fang? Are you- like Max?" asked Dr. Martinez. "Nope,"he said, sounding bored. "I'm the smart one." I resisted the urge to kick him in the shin.”

“Choose now,' he spat, his eyes practically shooting sparks. 'Me or him.' 'Gosh, Fang, you romantic fool,' I said sarcastically. 'How incredibly sexist-pig of you.”