“He wore binoculars around his neck the way librarians wear their glasses.”
“He was wearing a little bag of “Mojo” around his neck.”
“Jesus didn't just wear a cross around his neck, he carried it on his back.”
“Goodness gracious me,' exclaimed Alexia, 'what are you wearing? It looks like the unfortunate progeny of an illicit union between a pair of binoculars and some opera glasses. What on earth are they called, binocticals, spectoculars?”
“The stupid thief wears the sheep bell around his neck! Such stupidity of the bad is always good for the society!”
“The chain of command, I wear it around my neck.”