“A brick could be used as a device to deliver bad news. Sometimes it's better to be blunt.
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“A brick could be used as a floatation device. But only use it if the person drowning is a politician.
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“A brick could be used as a flotation device, if you’re Michael Phelps and don’t need it.
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“A brick could be used as a Sexual Orientation Device. But I don’t need it, because I know my sexual orientation—north!
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“A brick could be used like a fleeglebeegle, which in turn could be used like a zoopkatofka, which itself could be used like a Wexlybexter Device (the one with the hand crank, not the one with the foot peddles). Gosh, I hope I clarified at least one thing for you.
”

“A brick could be used in conjunction with another brick to be the Democrat and Republican Presidential candidates. People will say, Vote for the brick on the left, or, The brick on the right is better. But do not be deceived—they're both the same, and they're both bricks.
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“A brick could be used as a brick. Clever, right?
”