“A brick could be used to tell time. And just between you and me, I hope that brick tells time to go to hell.
”

“A brick could be used as a measurement of time. Yes, just think how stylish you’ll look with a brick duct taped to your wrist!
”

“A brick could be used to show how patient you are. Somewhere between one brick and a million bricks lies a home. For me, my home is one brick, and I carry it with me wherever I go, because I’m always on the move. Maybe one day, when I’m a wealthy man, I’ll get a second brick and walk around with my mansion in my hands.
”

“A brick could be used as motivation to acquire more bricks. Hey, I’m just trying to help here. Don’t shut me out by building a wall between us.
”

“A brick and a blanket could be used to replace the words yes and no. But which is witch? You’ll have to burn me at the stake before I tell you anything. 
”

“A brick could be used in a manner most secret. But Shh! I can't tell you. What part about secret don't you understand?
”

“A brick could be used as toilet paper—especially if you just shit a brick. You could shit and wipe your way to a wall of privacy.
”