“A feather taped to a vibrator is a tickling machine to induce hunger, and NOT a sex toy. So you won’t have to ask if you see it in my fridge.”

“Like a vibrator bolted on a bulldozer, I’m a regular sex machine.”

“A vibrating toothbrush is one hygienic marvel of a sex toy. The next time I want to make love, I’ll make a dentist appointment.”

“I asked her out on a date, and she said, “Sorry, I can’t see you.” “That’s no problem,” I replied, “I won’t wear my invisible cloak.”

“I invented an invisible machine to help you get to sleep. It only works after your eyes stay shut for a length of time. It’s also so quiet that you won’t hear it.”

“She asked me if I wanted to have sex, and I replied, “With you, or in general?”

“No, lady, you didn’t have sex with me, you had sex with my clone. I’m sorry, but I don’t know you.”