“A part-time worker is fully employed, half the time. In other words, they are part-time unemployees.”

“I don't understand people who say they need more "Me Time." What other time is there? Do these people spend part of their day in someone else's body?”

“Employment: I’ll trade my time and labor for your money. So time is not money, because money is time plus labor. I spend my time saving money, I spend my money saving time, and I labor hard to not labor hard.”

“Dream headline from Orafouraville Times: Man Let Go By Employer, Falls To Death”

“My name is a half an hour early, but my body is on time.”

“I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. In other words, I want to get married.”

“A manmade waterfall that was half man, half waterfall would have a hard time going upstairs. Thank God for waterproof elevators!”