“Arizona is the A to Z of abbreviations.”

“OK isn’t just all right—it’s also the abbreviation for the state above Texas.”

“The abbreviation for Brazil, BRA, makes me think of breasts. I have no idea why.”

“Falling in love too quickly spells disaster. But I’ve always lived dangerously, and I spell disaster with a Z.”

“Sometimes I get depressed about my age. In March I’ll be 26. If man weren’t measured in numbers, but rather letters, I’d be turning Z. And then I’d be dead.”

“I put a saddle on my salad, and I rode my horseradish to Rhode Island, where I was just in time to be late. I think I left my time zone change in my Arizona iced tea, so all I have to offer you to drink is water that’s been redirected from the Colorado River through a series of pipes and political litigation.”

“If love smelled like cheese, as some people assume it does, then I'd rather be a goat and make love all day long.”