“Book: Ten Steps to Asexuality and Financial Freedom, by Lonely Path”

“A brick could be placed down on the first step on the path to enlightenment.”

“I make believe like asexuals make love—alone, with cardboard tubes.”

“I'm asexual, though occasionally I'm attracted to inanimate objects. Mainly tube-shaped objects.”

“I want to write a story about an asexual unicycle who refuses to let a unicorn ride it.”

“Governments are nothing more than elaborate Rube Goldberg apparatuses, operating with absurd inefficiency. Why walk ten steps when you can make it there in a hundred?”

“This financial crisis in Europe would have left Greece in Ruins, but it’s been that way for 2,000 years.”