“Don’t rub noses with a shark. It may be the last dental appointment you ever have.”

“A brick could be used as bait for the vampire shark. Since nobody’s ever seen a vampire shark, let alone caught one, I think it would be unreasonable to dismiss the idea entirely.
”

“If you could smell my smile, you’d nose how bad I want to kiss you. But you can’t, and I don’t.”

“You have to slow down with this woman, because the moment she slows down and stops, she’ll die. She’s like a shark.” That’s what I told Renaldo, but how was I to know his girlfriend was literally a shark?”

“Love is what you make it. Unfortunately, I can’t make it today, as I have a doctor’s appointment.”

“I’ve often wondered why more science textbooks don’t tell teenagers that the only thing sharks like to eat more than fish, are dead prostitutes.”

“I don’t have to tell you, “I don’t have to tell you” before telling you something I don’t have to tell you. I also don't have to tell you I love you, but I do.”