“Don’t try to pull the wool over my eyes. You can’t fool an old sheep like me. To prove it, I’ll tell you that I’ve been continuously voting for the same person for president for years and years, a few of them even before he died.”

“I’m 30-years-old, and I still can’t get out from under my father’s shadow. He’s really tall, so maybe I’ll just ask him to move over a few feet.”

“Even when we’re old, I’ll still look at you with the same eyes. (Who else’s eyes am I going to look at you with?) My love for you is Louis Braillesque.”

“In middle school, Renaldo was voted most likely to vote in a Presidential election. But he was the most obvious choice to receive that accolade, since he was the only 17-year-old at school.”

“If anybody ever tells me to face them like a man, I’ll get offended, because my face can’t grow a beard.”

“Dear 30 years old, why are you stalking me? Please leave me alone or I’ll be forced to alert the authorities.”

“A brick could be renamed something clever and cute, like President, and repackaged and resold to a solid base of sheep consumers every four years. The sheeple will never even notice that every new model of brick is exactly like the last brick!
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