“Handcuffs barely wrap around the girth of my penis. I should run for Congress.”
“I bowl like I masturbate: with two hands. I should run for Congress.”
“My penis burns. I guess I should stop trying to put out forest fires with it.”
“My beard grows down to my toes,I never wears no clothes,I wraps my hairAround my bare,And down the road I goes.”
“For a moment on the top of that bare pain of rock I wonder if I should run behind or ahead-which is the best way to protect her-and then I find us just running side by side.”
“My penis’ name is Pride. Pride is something every woman should be filled with.”