“How can I clearly see what’s wrong with someone else, and then look at myself as though I’m standing in front of a fogged mirror?
”

“Sometimes we can’t see what’s right in front of us, because it’s behind us, and we’re looking in a mirror.”

“I breathe onto a mirror just to make sure I’m still alive, and to see how good looking my breath is.”

“I’m a logician. No matter how wrong I am, I can always convince myself I am right.”

“If you’re looking for someone to stand in the unemployment line, I’m the man for the job. And if you’re looking for a man who will make love to you all night long, then I’m the man for the job. I will help you find that man.”

“What’s next to my bed? One night stand, though personally I find them morally outrageous, not to mention the danger from STDs.”

“I can see myself in my teacher’s eyes. I look like a pupil.”