“How to arrive unexpectedly and invisibly: show up looking poor, but not homeless.”

“A good server knows how to be seen, yet remain invisible. I was a great server, and I achieved invisibility by never showing up for work. My boss ended up firing me, probably over petty jealousy.”

“Participation trophies are junk. If all you have to do is show up, how worthless are they? Unless you’re invisible and deaf, and then one of those trophies would be meaningful, because simply showing up is exactly what is hard for you to do.”

“Tomorrow night I’m giving a lecture on silence and invisibility. Don’t be surprised if I don’t show up.
”

“If I promise you I'll show up fifteen minutes late, I'll always arrive on time.”

“My 30th birthday will be arriving in a few months. It’s not arriving unexpectedly, I just wish it would have given me more of an advance notice, say another 30 years.”

“Here is my naked body. Take a long look at what nobody else can look at. And hurry up, before all the spectators show up.”