“I am the man of your dreams. Go back to sleep.”

“I find out a lot about myself by sleeping. Dreams, they are who I am when I’m too tired to be me.”

“I could be the man of your dreams. I could also be the alarm clock, stealing you away from the man of your dreams.”

“I just realized my reality, and I’d like to say No Thanks. I’m going back to sleep.”

“When I write I am an avocado, and in a team sport setting, I am guacamole. And not to sour cream on your dreams, but with my love life, I am a nacho.”

“In my dream I woke up to realize I was tired and needed to go to sleep. Then I slowly remembered that I was asleep, but that I needed to wake up and write this down. Blah.”

“I once had a dream about a woman, and the next day she died. I stopped sleeping for three days after that to try to save some lives, but then my body relented and I went back to being a murderer.”