“I belong, and my penis, it be long.”

“There’s a penis in my penne pasta. It’s my penis, but that doesn’t mean it belongs there.”

“I enjoy the small things in life. Like my penis.”

“Let my hand be a blanket for my penis.
”

“I am one pair of roses away from the grave,” I told the midget with the twelve-inch erection. It wasn’t his—he was just holding it for a friend (that impressive penis belonged to a much taller man). Ah, but that’s life, no?”

“I’m a magician. I can make food appear—and out of my penis, no less.”

“I threw out my sausage, and replaced it with a healthier penis metaphor, like a cucumber.”