“I collect the most valuable thing in the world—free time. But unlike other priceless things, I don’t need a safe to keep it safe, because I keep all my free time in the past, where nobody can touch it—not even me. My collection grows larger every day.”

“I collect hair. I keep most of it on my floor, but my most valuable patches I display on the bodies of a few cats I have roaming my house like walking art displays that meow.”

“The only thing that helps me keep my slender grip on reality is the friendship I have with my collection of singing potatoes.”

“How can I keep my soul in me, so that it doesn't touch your soul? How can I raise it high enough, past you, to other things?”

“Who do you think keeps this country safe so you can sleep at night?”“I don’t sleep most nights. And to be honest, Your Grace, I don’t feel all that safe.”

“Alex, I don't need to keep myself safe from you. I don't want to keep myself safe from you. You mean too much to me. I'd rather have a lifetime of heartache, from you breaking my heart, than even imagine my life without you at all. Because a life without you wouldn't be a life at all.”