“I conceal myself behind cynicism because it’s safe. Camouflage is more protective than body armor. Why do you think the Department of Defense contacted me to design a gun that shoots insults?”

“What is man’s shared IQ? And more important, how thick should my body armor be to protect myself against it?”

“What has started you on this?" I asked. "We were talking about the holidays." "Los Angeles is not a safe place for a young woman alone. I feel it in my bones.""That's your arthritis, Aunt Sadie. Do you want me to get a gun? I'd probably shoot myself in the foot.""I'd rather you got married again.""That might be worse than shooting myself in the foot.”

“You can’t kill me with a gun. (Thanatos)I know, but it’s fun as hell just shooting you. (Zarek)”

“As Mab explains to Will why using magic has to hurt...."Think about guns. If it hurt you to shoot a gun, don't you think people would think harder about when and where and why they did it?”

“If you have a gun, unload it. (Mike)Why? (Nick)Because if you don’t, you’re going to shoot this asshole which will only piss him off more. (Mike)”