“I could write from anywhere, including the moon, provided I had a pencil and not a pen.”

“You’ll drown in my love story, if I ever write it using a fountain pen.”

“If pens doubled as bullets, I bet few writers would want to write about war.”

“I think the perfect pen name is Quill McSeagull. Especially for writing flights of fancy—and nothing has more feathers than a love poem.”

“I can provide a witness who didn’t see me at the scene of the crime. That witness can also prove they didn’t see me anywhere else either, thus showing that I didn’t exist at that moment in time.”

“A great gift would be a cheap pen, mounted on a wooden plaque, with the accompanying label that reads, “This is the pen that was first used to write down these words. This is history. This happened. Now, go write your own history. But use another pen, because this one’s not only super glued to the wood, but it’s out of ink.”

“Only the living can read. This means that when I write, my target market is people of the future. Greetings, people of the moon!
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