“I didn’t get your letter. I did receive it, but I didn’t understand it.”

“I didn’t go to the water park because it was raining, and I didn’t want to get wet.”

“I thought I did, but I guess I didn’t. But I did think I did, and it’s the thought that counts, right?”

“I didn’t get sucker punched. It was more of a lollipop.”

“I like to get to-go boxes at restaurants where not only did I not eat in, but apparently their patrons didn’t either, judging by how much food they left on their plates.”

“I told you I didn’t want to go. Of course, I really did want to go, but I just said I didn’t want to go so you’d beg me to go and I could feel needed. I’m needy like that.”

“I invited my girlfriend over and made her dinner. I didn’t cook, but I did eat her.”