“I got a new car. I just need to put it together. They’re easier to steal piece by piece.”

“I’ve got a piece of the American Dream. I don’t have a house, but I do have a new chandelier. Now I just have to build a house around it.”

“It’s 3:32, and I need just one more ingredient to finish baking 3:33. Would you prefer the AM or the PM piece?”

“Everyone owns a piece of democracy. Actually, I own two pieces, and each one has a nipple.”

“For your birthday I got you some batteries. They’re dead, just like you’ll soon be.”

“It’s easier to pick apart what is, than put together what isn’t.”

“I stabbed the intruder with a knife. How else was I supposed to cut him into bite-sized pieces?”