“I hate noise pollution. Get that filthy soda can out of my ear!”

“Noise soup. I just made it. Taste it with your ears.”

“I think you’re funny, and the toilet sounds like a soda can opening when it flushes. It’s a diet soda, so it’s less filling and more fattening.”

“My subconscious is like the ocean, only deeper and less polluted.”

“Maybe I could hear better if my ears weren’t flipped inside out. Unlike a cat’s ears, you can’t tell mine are flipped over. But they must be, because I only seem to listen to myself.
”

“My ears are as blind as my eyes are deaf. But my nose, it can see the truth, except when I block its line of site with my index fingers.”

“I like how cats’ ears can flip inside out. It’s as if they’re saying, Keep talking, human, but I’m not even listening.”