“I have an 8th grade education. Of course, I also have a bachelor’s degree.”

“I’m a man of leisure. That’s because I have an English degree and can’t get a job.
”

“I like cardboard. Of course, I have to be in the mood to eat Pizza Hut.”

“I don’t have to tell you, “I don’t have to tell you” before telling you something I don’t have to tell you. I also don't have to tell you I love you, but I do.”

“I also should have come up with a product description.”

“If I were the King’s official mapmaker, I’d also be the second largest landholder (after the King, of course). Would I own the land? Of course—just look at all the official maps.”

“Whenever I drink, I always have one too many. Of course, I only ever drink one.”