“I know what is wrong, I know what is right, and most importantly, I know what is left. Nothing is left, now that she left and took all her love.”

“She loves me. She must, because she left flowers in the fridge from her date. She knows how I love flower salad.”

“I left the door open so you could come in—and I could go out. That’s what being in love is all about.”

“Empty packets of hot sauce remind me of the love I used to have for her. Now all I’m left with is this yummy taco.”

“I watch my feet as I walk along. Left, right, left, right, why is everything about politics?”

“She told me she loved me. Most men wouldn’t know how to respond, but I did. What else could I say but, “Thanks, Grandma!”

“I like watching baseball as much as my grandma’s left ear is loud. (She’d probably give her right ear for a left ear that wasn’t soundproof).”