“I may not be a horse whisperer, but I certainly can and do shout at unicorns.”

“I’m like a ventriloquist chasing his own voice. I can whisper and shout at the same time, and this is the closest approximation I have to a description of love. I would offer you something to drink, but I’m not in the kitchen, even though it may sound like I am.”

“A whisper is the shadow of a shout, and I keep a few in my wallet to use at the strip club on rainy nights.”

“A whisper is like the shadow of a shout. My shout’s a little too green if I let it grow in my neighbor’s yard.”

“When a whisper seems like a shout, I know I need to get some sleep. But I can’t lay down without first taking off my bunny ears.”

“My words and my ideas are my property, and I’ll keep and protect them as surely as I do my stable of unicorns.”

“A shadow is midnight’s whisper, I thought as I shouted at my invisible clone. Killing your own clone is the only time you could commit murder and suicide at the same time by killing just one person.”