“I think you’re funny, and the toilet sounds like a soda can opening when it flushes. It’s a diet soda, so it’s less filling and more fattening.”
“As far as I can tell, dumping soda on people is the equivalent of ‘Hi, it’s nice to meet you’ in this part of the world. Frankly, I think standard greetings work better, but what do I know?”
“To live in Metropolis was to know that the exceptional was as commonplace as diet soda, that abnormality was the popcorn norm.”
“Your anger is like the bubbles in a can of soda. The more you’re shaken, the more you want to let it out. The longer you keep it in though, the greater the size of the eventual explosion - and the flatter the drink at the end.”
“Perhaps you have a lumpy ass because you are perserving your fat cells with diet soda”
“Ish #19 "If your diet soda has zero calories, zero sugar and zero fat, what the hell are you drinking?”