“I took the wheels of my bike off in support of your bicycle race to support bike riding.”

“To be environmentally friendly, I’d ride my stationary bike to work. I hope my career works out, because it feels like I'm just spinning my wheels.”

“I want to buy a sports car, because I like riding bicycles. Hold on to my handlebar mustache if you value your life.”

“Somebody took my bicycle tire, my bicycle seat, and both my pedals. They stole my whole unicycle!”

“A stationary bike is a device that epitomizes the phrase “hurry up and wait.”

“I honk at protestors to show my support, and also tell them to get the fuck out of my way.”

“I once watched several criminals engage in an organized argument, while an audience of supporters cheered them on, but I was so disgusted that I had to turn off the political debate.”