“I want to say something so embarrassing about September that even the leaves start blushing and turning red.”

“I want a white car that turns red when I’m embarrassed.”

“When bananas blush, they turn brown, not red. And when tomatoes blush, you’ve probably said something really naughty.”

“Sunburns are so embarrassing that they always make me blush all over.”

“I want to write a song about the only girl I’ve ever loved. And the chorus will say something like, “I really want to see you tonight, so I hope you leave your blinds open.”

“People don’t blush when they’re embarrassed. White people blush when they’re embarrassed. Why so embarrassed, white people? Any skeletons in your closet? Oh yeah, that’s right—we’ve got more skeletons in our closet than anybody.”

“Things aren’t often what they appear to be at first blush. But embarrassment is.”