“I want to start a company called “We Do.” My tagline will be: We at We Do do what we do so you don’t have to.”

“He’ll think I’ll do it, he’ll act like I’ll do it, and so I will do it. But if he will think differently, maybe I will act differently. But I know me, I know him, he knows himself, he knows me, and he is my clone, so we will each act exactly how we think we will, and we will each act like the other, and this is why I’ll have to kill him.”

“I can’t do my job, if you don’t do yours. I also can’t do my job, so can you do mine too?”

“If I knew what you’d do, exactly when you knew what you’d do, then I’d either be you or I’d be God. And we both know I’m not you.”

“I don’t want to do anything I have to do, even if I want to do it. Compulsion takes the fun out of it.”

“By the time I tell you to start doing something, it’s time for you to stop listening and start doing. Especially if what I tell you to do is start listening.”

“Because even among contrarians, I’m a contrarian. But all of this is just words of bronze, third place rhetoric. What do I really mean when I say we want to shock society into awareness? Do we mean we want more originality and individuality? Less TV, more reading, writing, actual thinking? Less sheep, more shepherd pie? Yes, yes, and a little more pie, please. Oh, and some more sweet tea, too”