“I was honored at the awards ceremony. I didn’t get any recognition, but I was honored to be there. (Tickets were cheaper than I imagined!)
”

“My clones just honored me with the 2012 Man of the Year Award. But I wasn’t fooled—I knew they were really honoring themselves.”

“If I weren’t married, and I didn’t have a girlfriend, I’d ask that girl out. But what can I do? I’m an honorable guy.”

“I feel like someone who has a parade named in their honor, and doesn’t get invited.”

“I wouldn’t want the guests at my birthday party confusing my celebration with the Oscars. That’s why I’m having the awards ceremony after we eat cake and I open my presents.
”

“I didn’t get your letter. I did receive it, but I didn’t understand it.”

“There’s truth and honor in a mustache. And that’s why I started flying one on the flagpole outside of my house.”