“I was only 20% right, while she was 80% right. Still, I was right that she was wrong—20% wrong.”

“I know what is wrong, I know what is right, and most importantly, I know what is left. Nothing is left, now that she left and took all her love.”

“I remember my first cell phone number still. I may call it and ask to speak to myself from eight years ago. If they say I have the wrong number I’ll tell them, No, right number, wrong time.”

“I’m a logician. No matter how wrong I am, I can always convince myself I am right.”

“If I ever get a 20-dollar bill, I like to convert it into 20 singles, because women like guys with lots of money.
”

“Right now is the youngest I’ll ever be, so I suppose I’d better act immature while I still can.”

“Mr. Pot drank ten pots of coffee, even though I only made eight. That’s a savings of 20%!
”