“I’d make a good groom, if my last name were McBride.”
“If my name were Entist, I’d probably be a dentist. If my name were Dennis, I’d probably be into tennis. And if my name were Funnalingus, well, I’ll let you figure out what I’d enjoy.”
“If my name were Isaac Newton, would I be a famous no name? I’d have worldwide and historical name recognition, yet I’d be anonymous.”
“If I had the word “war” in my last name, like “Flowar,” I’d probably be a peaceful guy.”
“If my last name were Bedient, I’d want to Irishize it and have you call me O’Bedient. Of course, just because you call me, doesn’t mean I’ll come.”
“If my name were Mark Twain, I’d write under the pseudonym “Samuel Clemens.”