“If a building were shaped like a body, I’d imagine you’d exit out the rear.”

“What you’d call stealing, I’d call a mistake. Or, if I were a politician, I’d call it an opportunity, and my privilege.”

“My love for you is shaped like a left foot. And if you pulled my love out of your ass you’d know that.”

“If you were to talk about your nose, I’d take everything you’d say at face value.”

“If I knew what you’d do, exactly when you knew what you’d do, then I’d either be you or I’d be God. And we both know I’m not you.”

“I’d like to build a boat out of those little wooden planks that Starbucks provides to stir your coffee. The boat will be dedicated to our love, and it will take a lifetime to complete.”

“If birthdays fell from the sky like Saturdays shaped like saxophones, I’d learn how to play the flute on Tuesdays.”