“If you say renewable, I’ll think energy. If you say fore, I’ll think play. If you say binary, I’ll think anal defibrillator.”

“What makes you think of me? Don’t say nothing. The answer is I make you think of me. And I’ll make you do it at gunpoint.”

“Sometimes I’ll be walking along, thinking, and I’ll kick up some dust and I’ll say, Whoa! That makes sense, and I’ll have just had an epiphany, and then forget all about it because I’ll get distracted by my dirty shoes.”

“There’s no way to tell you the bad news without saying it, so I’ll say it with body language.”

“Sometimes I give automated responses to people without even listening to what they say. For example, someone might tell me, “Enjoy the movie,” and I’ll say, “Thanks, you too.” Or, someone will say, “Enjoy your meal,” and I’ll reply, “Thanks, I wish I were eating your pussy.”

“If you ask me if I know how to speak Latin, I’ll say, “No, it’s all Greek to me.”

“I’m thinking ahead to how I’ll be thinking back to me thinking ahead in this moment.”