“If you work in a hospital, you can’t easily fake call in sick to work. Oh, you’re sick? Well why don’t you come in to work and we’ll have a look at it.”

“I like to call in sick to work at places where I’ve never held a job. Then when the manager tells me I don’t work there, I tell them I’d like to. But not today, as I’m sick.”

“If the world were coming to an end tomorrow, I’d probably call in sick to work.”

“Work hard or don’t work hard, either way your hair will turn gray. I should let you be alone while you die, slowly.”

“In hospitality, people vacation where you live. And so when I stay home from work it’s like a double vacation.”

“A brick could be used to balance work and play. Just place the brick on the top of your head, and don’t let it drop. This will ensure you don’t play too hard—or work too hard.
”

“If I could capture the rays of the sun in a can, I'd paint a canvas with it and have you look at my work until the memory of my work was burned in your mind and your retinas burned out.”