“I’ll do anything for money. Anything except work.”

“Do onto others what others won’t do for themselves. If they won’t save their money, I’ll save their money for them.”

“I’ll put an oven mitt on before I handle anything hot—including my penis.”

“What is it about money that makes people kill for it? I’ll have to think about that next time I do it.”

“As a way for both of us to make money, I’ll hold you hostage, while at the same time, you’ll be holding me hostage,” I said to Orafoura.
“Won’t the ransom money you pay to me cancel out the money I’ll pay to you?” Orafoura said. 
“Not if I shoot you first. Then I’ll have all the ransom money!”

“I’m a poor worker. The quality of work I do is excellent, but I make no money.”

“What I’m doing is not doing anything, and I’m doing a half-ass job.”