“I’m always the last in love by exactly one person.”

“I’m probably the last person on earth who will tell you I want to be the last person on earth.”

“I am a juxtaposition. And at the same time, I’m not. I’m always like this because I’m not always like this because I’m always in love.”

“I’m a person, you’re a person, and we should make love. That is, if you’re a person who’s also roughly ½ of the population known as women.”

“I’m so old school I’m like a one-room schoolhouse—with no bathroom. I always keep it classy.”

“I’m a neat person (interesting), but I’m not a neat person (organized).”

“Love happens to some people, sometimes. Other times other stuff happens to other people. I’m a person like those people.”